A madness metal, impervious to harmful thought or deed...

Sunday, October 17

What's that you say?

You don't like my idea, but you want a "respin"? OK, I'll do it, if I must...

So here's what we had as a story "arc":

Episode 1: a mix of a bad sitcom with a "behind the scenes" documentary. The "cast" get big laffs on screen (mainly canned), and off screen think that they -are- the show. United, the stand for higher salaries, and writing control. Typically despicable over achieved actors. One wants to write, another to direct, blah blah blah. Try to make they somewhat sympathetic. In our last five minutes we wipe them all out. Deader than dead. In a vile fashion. Ha ha ha ha ha!

Episode 2: aftermath (deliberate play on the wholly awful "After M*A*S*H") --- how this is cast depends upon how we kill them off, I'm a big fan of having a plane crash into the studio, but apparently that's what turned a lot of people off. My idea was to have the crash survivors take over the show. I know it's dumb, a little too much like SOAP, but I think it could work. The show's sponsor demands the show continues. After all, the new publicity is doing so well for ratings on the syndication side... We get a new cast. I'd like to have this cast know, somehow, that they will eventually die too --- not be killed off fictionally, actually die as part of the show. Open casting, use a mix of "real" people and actors. We end up with a new crew selected.

Episode 3: backlash (not a play on anything) Joe Public revolts! They miss the old crew! They want their old friends back! They don't accept that the poor schmucks are dead! A suicide bomber takes out about 2/3rds of the new cast! What do you mean, lose the suicide bomber? That's all that episode 3 is! Can I make it a sniper then (no snipers are allowed in comedy TV). Fuck hollywood, I'll film in India and screw you guys.

Episode 4: rebuilding. The public mourns the deaths of the actors and their personas, firmly locked into disagreement over whether the original series or the second crew were better (can we get some cameos from Star Trek here?) --- rioting breaks out, and peace only is ensued when it turns out that one member of the original staff did survive! But who? Tune in next week! More casting, the casting session is a little like a parody of American Idol, so we get sued. Breaking the "forth wall" our characters plead for money to stave off legal action and ask if people can please try not to kill them. No-one dies in this episode.

Episode 5: relaunch! Our whacky crew get chosen to be part of the first community to live underwater! All take turns holding their breath for "practice"! Dispute in the background by the writers that this is "the dumbest idea ever". We lose a character who holds his breath too long. We say the "f" word. FCC sues show. Break the forth wall again. Explain to the aud what the forth wall is and that we think it should be broken and that we're not, actually, just copying "Moonlighting" - really, we're not. Last ten minutes of show are a condensed version of "Moonlighting". Teaser at end: who survived?

Episode 6: revelation. The original corporate sponsor is linked to the suicide bomber! Shock and awe! The show is cut loose, anchor-less, drifting --- until a christian broadcasting company (CBC!) picks up the funding and the drug-addled, whore-mongering cast members get some new "guidelines" to work from. Pope guest stars and actually converts one of our folks to his side. I want to have the Pope walk in on a scene of implied animal buggery and have a heart attack - but will those network tight asses let me? Oh no! Not -only- no Pope, also no animal abuse. I really wanted this show to end with "The NSPCA monitored all animal participants, and no animal was hurt or abused during the making of this show. Animals were hurt and abused in the making of "Hart to Hart", season three of "Frasier", and most every season of "Happy Days".". I think that's funny shit!

So that's our first "arc" as I had it outlined. We end on the cliffhanger of, with the Pope dead, will CBC renew the show? I know reading this synopsis it "doesn't seem all that funny" --- and to an extent it's not, it's an investigation into what is "funny" and what is "in poor taste". Ideas are welcome but note that they will become -my- ideas and I'll never acknowledge your input ("What, they posted it on a "bulletin board" on the "internets" Conan? I'll tell -you- what I'd put a "bullet in"! Ha ha ha ha ha!").

Sunday, October 10

Over

After some deliberation, I've decided to cut the cord on this (again). I'll leave this online for now, but no updates. Peace out y'all.

Saturday, October 9

Bring on the new

Imagine, if you will, a sit com that's now run for three seasons and is fading fast --- once upbeat and "dangerous" it's now flabby and insipid. The cast want million dollar per episode salaries, their PR folks want to make sure they have a future earning potential. Ladies and gents, our new proposal to hollywood which includes most of the jokes we made up for that deadbeat is "SitCom" - a behind the scenes look at things you didn't want to see.

Pitch it, boyoh!